- You look good on him!
- I felt him come into my hands when I gave him his head
- I need spurs and a whip to really get him going.
- He's too much for her, maybe you should get on.
- He won't come into my hands!
- I didn't recognize you in clothes!
- As he comes up, lean forward and run your hands up the crest of his neck.
- There's nothing like having 17 hands between your legs.
- I'm gonna get off now.
- She's such a good girl, the instant she sees me walk out of the house, she pees!
- He's a bit of a bumpy ride, just try not to grip with your thighs too much.
- He needs a good 20 min to warm-up...
- Relax your back, don't pinch with your knees, go with the motion, rock your pelvis...
- Don't pump too much.
- Stop - so I can take your rubbers & chains off!
- Now where did I leave that whip?!?!?!
- How long of a shaft do I need for my new driving pony?
- Easy there, son, you've gotta love on them a little bit first, before you hop up (said to the stallion)
- Have any of you ever used him before? What do you think of his performance and semen quality?
- Just three more to inseminate, and I'll be done for today
- Do you think he's too big for me?
- Give me your penis back - I wasn't done cleaning it!
- I need a leg up.. he's to big to mount from the ground.
- When I was younger I used to think, "The bigger the better!" Now that I'm older, I kind of like the little ones.
- If he's not ridden 5 days a week he gets cranky...
- He got me off twice today.
- He's so wide- my hips ache after I ride him.
- I hate it when I'm already mounted and then realize I've forgotten my whip and spurs.
- (At the racetrack: a groom to an exercise rider) "You on me next?"
- A woman was in a store describing the breastplate which has three pieces of leather. two go over the shoulders and one between the legs etc.
- I'm doing that big black stallion today. Yeah, he was pretty wild last time so I'm going to have to be firm with him.
- He always drops when I rub his belly
- Now Honey, don't forget to tie the kids up before you feed them
- Does your boy just love to slobber all over you too?
- Just crack him on the ass - that'll get his attention!
- He hasn't figured out that he can poop and keep going yet.
- I gave him his head last night and he was so receptive to it
- Up, down - up, down - up, down
- You need to open your thighs a little more
- Get your hands out of your crotch if you want to feel his mouth
- How many babies did you have this year? - Only three, lost the fourth one, dammit. I'll shoot for four again next year.
- He looks great, hop off and let me have a go!
- Let's tease her a bit, and once she's ready, then we'll bring out the stud.
- His natural rhythm is short and bouncy, but if you want a good ride, you have to teach him about long and deep
- He needs to come under himself more...
- That is way too big for her mouth to handle.....
- She really drops in her back when he mounts her........
- Is she winking with her backend yet?.......
- He works so much better when I carry my whip
- My girlfriend was wondering after you were done with me if you could do her too?! (said to the farrier)
- You know, money's a little tight right now and I really don't want to pay for shoes for my five-year-old this winter. Do you think it would be okay to just let him go barefoot?
found it here http://www.dressageart.com/horsesayings1.htm